do 18 year olds need chaperones?

my first born wants to travel half way around the world to spend a week with his friends during spring break, in march 2011.

being the kind of person he is, along with his emailed request to go, he sends his dad and me details of his holiday schedule, his friends' holiday schedules, flight options, ticket costs, cost of hotels and service apartments (weekday and weekend rates) in the country he plans to visit.

impressive, but we gene donors freak out anyway.

me, still the conservative villager under my lipstick and concealer, freaking out at the idea of a teenager flying halfway around the world to spend a week with friends; his dad, who is ok with the half way around the world for a week idea, freaking out over the trouble he might get into- probably having nightmarish recollections of his own college days- something that does not bother me even after it has been pointed out; i know my son... err... at least think i do!

so, 'pa, he lives in a different country for heaven's sake!' i protest. 'you have no idea what he is up to there and you're ok with that. so how is this trip different!' i wonder if i should point the father to first born's facebook page.

anyway dh comes up with this crazy proposal that i go and spend that week skulking about in the same service apartment my brat is likely to stay, just to keep an eye on the boy. i can't think of anything more horrid, for both brat and me.

picking a time that's appropriate, what do you think about it raja, i ask. i take pains to point out that i'm a super cool mom who will not get in his way, or on his case, as long as he wasn't doing dangerous things of course.

'it's simple ma,' he says, quick as a flash. 'nana and you have to realise i'm not 14 anymore. also, my friends and i are not so stupid that we will break laws with no care for consequences. that said, if having a chaperone is the only way i can travel, i'd rather not go. i'll wait till you can trust me to travel to a foreign country on my own.'

then he moved on to something else. no arguments, no tantrums, nothing. he just made his point and moved on!

from past experience, i know that first born's 'oh so reasonable' handling of situations gets people to agree to even the most outrageous of requests, and i can't see this as being any different, but i'd like to see where it goes anyway!

i also think i would have made a nice mom for me. sigh.

birthday presents, and how to get what you want!

last night, chellam, raja and i walked into the taj for a late, late dinner, and saw this prominently displayed sign that said 'salvatore ferragamo at the taj coromandel'

after squeals of delight from my daughter who wouldn't know a ferragamo from a frock stitched by the local roadside tailor, sarcastic comments about overpriced italian brands, courtesy my son, and my observations on the psychological differences between paying a couple of hundred dollars vs many thousands of rupees for a tie, we settled in to the usual crazy dinner conversations  the family is known to have!   

the topic of conversation today was chellam and her penchant for everything branded, hyped and overpriced, and how she would soon (in about 11 years :)) have to foot her own bills. 

amidst much hooting and laughter and protests, we figured out this is how she would probably fill her closets with designer junk.  

chellam, from somewhere in europe, calling her brother - haaii annnaa!!! (some polite conversation follows) 

brother, rudely cutting her off - ok, what do you want?

chellam - nothing anna, it's my birthday in a few days, so i was wondering if you were planning to get me a present. (silence on the line, so chellam bravely pushes on) anna, will you get me a pair of jimmy choos?

long silence again, then, brother -  sure... in your dreams! (click of receiver in her ear)

chellam calls her mother next. polite conversation follows, then - ma, its my birthday in a few days...

mother, cutting in- yes, bangaru, i know. i've arranged for a special puja and a homam in your name. i'll send you the prasadam as soon as i get it. put some kumkum on your forehead every night without fail, ok?

chellam rolling her eyes -her mother's a hopeless case- and hanging up. she can always blame it on the connection later!

she calls her father. 

father - yes, what is it? i'm in the middle of a monthly review meeting!

chellam - no nana, it's my birthday in a few days, and i was wondering if i could pick up a present for myself.

father, relieved that that's all it is, and figuring he can get off the phone in less than 2 minutes, is all sweet and indulgent now - sure kanna, get yourself something nice. what do you want?

chellam - nothing much nana. is a pair of shoes or something like that ok with you?

father, glancing at his watch - sure kanna, get yourself a couple of nice pairs. but get something sensible, not something horrible in purple or orange, ok? take care of yourself. are you dressing warmly enough? don't go out in the wind without your thermals. i've got to go now. call me on sunday. love you.

chellam hangs up with a wide grin on her face. 2 pairs! yyyesss!! 

father hangs up with a sigh of relief. shoes!! now back to the meeting.

of course he has no idea what shoes she has in mind or how much they cost, and she's not going to be around when the credit card slip arrives and he bursts a blood vessel!